My Happy Ending
by witch-mistress-animaru
Summary: Touya x Meiling. Sequel to MHW. Not a songfic, full novel. Kaho's death left Touya helpless and wasted. Meiling watched him suffer from afar, hoping that one day, he will be hers at last. Chapter 6: Wed
1. Full Summary

My Happy Ending

Witch-Mistress-Animaru

A/N: Here's the sequel, as promised, uploaded the same time as the epilogue. Enjoy my first Touya-Meilin Fic!

Full Summary:

Meilin has had a crush on Sakura's elder brother ever since she first met him, that is, Syaoran's and Sakura's secret wedding. But at the time he was seeing Mizuki Kaho, a teacher at Tomoeda much older than she was. Then she made a big mistake: she confessed her love for him. He regarded her feelings as a huge joke. Hurt and betrayed, Meilin refused to ever meet him again, especially when he married Kaho barely a year later. She has long given up her love for him, determined to forget him.

Then something unexpected happens. Kaho dies on Syaoran's and Sakura's wedding. She rushes to his side only to learn he has given away his only child with Kaho. She does everything to get the child back, and stood in the shadows as Touya silently suffered his loss.

And when she thought everything was lost, one night changes everything…

Touya is rendered helpless by Kaho's death. He gave away their daughter and drowned himself in alcohol. Yet, Meilin didn't give up.

One drunken night equals marriage plus baby.

Meilin almost wanted to give up her love; Touya's coldness is overwhelming.

Little by little, though, he began to see Meilin more and more and forget Kaho more each day.

But what if this time, it's Meilin who gives up?

Quite short, yes, but…this is it! I'll upload the prologue next time, there isn't much time!

Love lots,

Witch-Mistress-Animaru


	2. Prologue: One Day Changes Everything

My Happy Ending

Witch-Mistress-Animaru

A/N: Just something to keep me going before school starts yet again.

Prologue

One Day Changes Everything

_Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom, there lived a beautiful princess. But there's no happy ending for this princess; the one she loved, the king of yet another kingdom, was already married to a beautiful and kind queen. The princess knew she'd stay alone for all her life, for she was sure she'd never love somebody else again. The princess cried herself to sleep each night, knowing there's no possibility of having the king without killing the queen. Like all princesses, she had a fairy godmother that pitied her and tried to do what the princess cannot. But the queen was too sweet and kind for murder. So she just suffered silently each night. And the princess eventually became a queen — a queen known for her heartlessness and cruelty. And she lived, alone and friendless, in her huge, empty castle freezing with coldness, unhappily…ever after…_

She closed the notebook she was writing on shut. Yawning, she stood up from her swivel chair, gazing absently at the window.

_This is Syaoran's day, so I agreed to step in for him. Well, I've seen him married once before; I think that'd be enough. Besides, there're so many things to do around here._

She paced back and forth around the huge office, a pen in her hands. The notebook she was writing on earlier lay on the table, its pages flicking open a bit from the breeze of the air conditioner behind the chair.

She has always wanted to write, ever since she was a kid. Only, she never had a chance to nurture her hobby; the family wanted her to excel in business, like her cousins. And she didn't have the heart to argue, or perhaps she had always been weak, unlike what everyone believed.

_There's no such thing as a fairytale, _she thought, her eyes growing misty as she thought of what she just wrote in her diary. _It's just rubbish fed to children to pacify them._

She's already twenty-five, and yet, she was still blessedly single. She'd had a boyfriend or two in the past, but that had been ages ago. She didn't have a single fling for the past five or so years. Sometimes, she even wonders if she's frigid or something, because she honestly can't feel anything anymore…anything.

"Miss Li?" A brunette poked her head in the office. On her hand was a stack of folders. "The Li-Wong Contract arrived just now. Would you like to go through it now?"

"Ah, yes, yes. Bring it over here, to the desk, onegai? Arigatou gozaimasu, Mika-san."

The woman only nodded before turning away.

She flicked the first folder open and skimmed the first page.

_The LGC-Wong Textile Mills Partnership Contract_

_As Procured December 15, 2006_

_Under the Agreement of Mr. Li Xiao Lang and Mr. Freddie Wong_

_Prepared by Attorneys Fay Lim-Ku, Aidan Co and Partners_

_Subject to the Partners' Approval_

_Warning: The contents of this file are strictly confidential. Give only to certified persons involved in the contract._

_Policies of the Partnership_

She stopped at that. She decided to just leave it to the files waiting for approval. She chanced a glance at the digital wall clock.

_11:25,_ it read.

"It's almost lunchtime, then. I guess I'll take an early break." She walked straight toward the door and greeted Mika.

"I'll go have lunch now, Mika-san. Leave all files in the office."

"Yes, Miss Li. Is there anything else?"

"Yes; take an early lunch yourself. You look dead on your feet."

"Thank you, Miss Li. I'd do that."

She shook her head resignedly, gazing at the workaholic woman by the office door.

"Um, I hope you don't mind me asking, Mika-san, demo…how old are you?"

"I'm turning twenty-two this summer."

"You're…quite young. Don't you have a boyfriend or…sorry, I shouldn't have asked. I'm going now."

She turned away slowly, thinking of how she was when she was Mika's age. She was worse.

"A word of advice, Mika-san…"

"…Learn to live your life…someone as young as you are shouldn't be working this hard."

"What is it, Miss Li? You forget anything?"

"No…I didn't say anything. I didn't say anything at all."

_I'm living an empty life_

_And I wish I had more to show them all_

_Than just money and worldly treasures_

_I wish I had someone to share them with_

_Someone to kiss hello and goodbye_

_Someone to cuddle with at nights_

_Someone who'll love just me and no one else_

_And I'll ask for nothing more…_

_Nor would I ask for anything less_

She walked and walked and walked, not looking back.

_Mika reminds me so much of what I was, years and years ago…_

…_after I lost him._

She ate quickly, barely noticing the food going in to her system. Her thoughts had gone astray to the life she lived. Perhaps it was impossible to dwell on the past without feeling the familiar twinge of regret and sadness. She pushed her plate aside, left a few bills beside it as she stood up and left.

Tears fell from her eyes before she could stop them. Wiping them angrily, she gazed ahead of her.

_Don't go crying over spilled milk. It's too late; he's very much married now._

She went back to the office in a blur. She barely noticed the employees who greeted her or the fact that Mika had not risen from her desk to have lunch.

She sat down on the desk, her ruby eyes glinting.

"Get a grip on yourself, Meilin. There's plenty of work to do."

Suddenly, the intercom rang.

"Yes, Mika-san?"

"Meilin? Syaoran here. Can you hurry over? It's an emergency."

"What…but…what happened?"

"Just…hurry! I have no time to talk; we're on our way to the hospital!"

"Who's been hurt? Is it Sakura? Xiao Chen?"

"No, it's…it's Kaho-san, do hurry."

"Do you mean…she's giving birth now?"

"No…she's been shot…I need to go now. Hurry!"

"Wha —?"

"He needs you. Hurry!" Syaoran had hung up.

Meilin didn't know how she reached the hospital. All she knows is that she had to…

She dashed to the front desk and asked for the room of Kinomoto Kaho, but there was none. Could that mean —?

_No! He won't be able to take that!_

She was about to walk away when she saw…

…him.

"Do something, please! My wife…please!"

"We couldn't do anything anymore, sir. Gomen… But if it's any consolation, the baby…she lived."

She gasped a bit audibly, but nobody noticed her.

"What do you mean, if it's any consolation? I want my wife…My wife…"

"Sir, please…"

"To hell with the child! Give it away! I don't want it…Kaho…Kaho…why? Why?!!" It was the first time she ever saw Touya lose control. Tears streamed down his cheeks. His hands clutched around the doctor's collar, pinning him to the wall.

_Touya…_

"Sir, please…I'm…we're very sorry, sir." The doctor gently removed Touya's hands from his neck and walked away, his head down.

"My wife…she can't have died, she can't have!" He slumped against the wall and slid down to the floor. Meilin's heart ached for him but she can't do anything, anything at all.

_Walk away and don't go back_

_Go on and never return_

_Gaze ahead, look forward_

_For it's the only way_

_To live, live, live_

_Regret will do nothing_

_It will hinder you, destroy you_

_Look forward with a heart full of hope_

_With nothing to say sorry for_

_With nothing to say 'If only…' for_

_Without saying 'It could've been…'_

_And life won't be so cruel anymore_

His cries echoed in the empty room…Like a loon crying to the moon…

…And she watched from outside, powerless, helpless.

The Funeral

The ceremony was almost over. The casket was lowered to the ground and was being covered with soil. Sakura was crying silently beside Syaoran. Touya, meanwhile, stood closest to the grave. His grief seemed to be beyond tears. But she knew better; she knew that he was only pretending to be strong.

She stood away from the crowd, alone. She was draped in black and sunglasses shield her eyes.

She stood there, even though the ceremony was over. She stood there despite the cold wind that wafted to her face.

She stood there, for how long she did not know.

_I am here though you cannot see me_

_I am beside you though you can't feel me_

_Whatever it takes, no matter how long_

_I'll stay beside you, trying to be strong_

_For when the wind blows_

_Who'll hold you still and keep you steady?_

_Who will keep you warm?_

_Nobody but me_

_Even if you can't see me_

_I'll shelter you from harm_

TBC

Stupid spur-of-the-moment free-verse poems by yours truly:

Empty Life

No Regrets

I'm here


	3. Chapter 1: Salvation

My Happy Ending

Witch-Mistress-Animaru

A/N: Two more fics and I'm so gonna upload Sweet Deception, a historical fic with lines from modern songs and such. This is my favorite right now, and yeah, I got the idea from Aisaki Sumi's Through a Looking Glass, I think, and I'd admit that much. However, the story takes a different turn in my fic, though the characters are based on the same real people from Japan's history. The thing is, I'd like to make it clear that the real Taira Antoku was just a child when he was appointed emperor by Taira Kiyomori, his grandfather. But I swear the story's my own making. I'm still thinking if I'm gonna switch the original story and make Syaoran the descent of Minamotos. Hmm, I'll think about it. But now I'm spoiling the suspense, just wait for it. After MHE and Cold Fire.

Here we go!

1: Salvation

_Once upon a time, there lived a queen whose cold demeanor was created by the emptiness around her. The reason behind this coldness is a king she loved, a king married to a beautiful, kind queen. She had resigned herself to remain an empty shell, until fate took things in its hands: The queen died, leaving the king all alone._

_Does happiness have a chance for the lonely queen of ice?_

Touya opened his eyes with a groan. His eyelids felt like they had lead pinned on them. Yet, somehow, he wanted to wake up. Or rather, he had been sleeping for too long that his biological clock won't let him sleep again.

He stood up sluggishly, sunlight streaming to his eyes, momentarily blinding him. All the while he felt desperation, anger, defeat and vulnerability. He wondered why.

His body seemed to have made it to the shower, for the next he felt apart from numbness was cold droplets of water making contact with his skin.

He walked out of the shower a few minutes later, half-asleep. Before he knew it, he stumbled upon a piece of metal, almost sent sprawled to the floor.

He opened his eyes and saw, for the first time, the mess that was his house.

Empty cans of beer littered on the floor, and it was one of them that caused him to stumble. The trash can was full to the brim, and his shirt of the past night was on the table.

He was about to call around the house when he remembered.

The reason of his miserable existence. The reason why he never wants to wake up again. The reason why his life is just a routine. The reason why he'll never laugh again.

His wife, Kaho, was dead.

Nothing he said or did would change anything.

Tears sprang again from his eyes, blurring his vision. A painful lump formed in his throat while his eyes burned.

"Kaho! Why? Why, my dearest? Why?!" He punched the wall again and again, not caring if he got hurt. His fists were already numb from the pain.

Then his eyes opened, the tears stopping at once. Yesterday…

Oh yes. Yesterday, he gave his daughter away…

"_Are you sure about this, Kinomoto-san?" The doctor asked him._

"_Hai, sensei…" He answered flatly, his eyes looking anywhere but on the child bundled in the doctor's arms._

_The doctor sighed resignedly. He had no power to overrule the parent._

"_Well, then, you have to sign these papers, sir —"_

_The baby's cries drowned the rest of the doctor's words._

_Like a child afraid of what he might hear, Touya clapped his hands over his ears, closing his eyes._

"_Make her stop, please make her stop crying!"_

_The doctor silently beckoned one of the nurses to take his daughter away before shoving the papers in his hands, the papers for adoption consent. He stopped for a moment before he signed them._

"_That's all right, Kinomoto-san. Now…" He cut the doctor's words._

"_I shall be going now, sensei. Arigatou Gozaimasu."_

_He left the hospital with no idea where he was going. He ended up buying two six-packs and going home to drown himself in misery._

_I know you'll never forgive me for what I did, Kaho… But I can't be a good father to her, when she only reminds me of you…of the things we endured together…_

_Without you, it's just no use…everything's worthless…_

With those words out of his system, he walked numbly to his room and did his routine lifelessly, like a walking zombie.

--

Meiling entered LGC quickly. She wore sunglasses to cover her swollen eyes.

"Ohayou, Li-san." One of the employees she met in the entrance greeted her.

"Ohayou," she answered, not bothering to turn and look to see who it was.

She got to her office and headed for the phone.

"Ohayou gozaimasu, Tokyo Hospital."

"Ohayou, this is Yin Meiling and I inquired yesterday about, the baby of Kinomoto Touya…"

"Hai. Wait a moment, ma'am. I suggest you talk to the doctor who handled her. Toshigawa-sensei, a moment please. It's Mrs. Yin here…"

"Moshi-moshi," a male voice answered on the other end.

"Moshi-moshi, Toshigawa-sensei. This is Yin Meiling and I…"

"Yes, you called yesterday about the child. Well, unfortunately, she has been put up for adoption."

"Nani?!"

"Hai. Regrettably, an elderly couple came and took her. They have long since wanted a child of their own. The baby is no longer with us."

"That quick? Don't the couples who want to adopt go through some process?"

"Ah, well, there was no problem with the legal aspects, ma'am."

"And where can I find the two?"

"Ano…gomenasai, but I can't give out their names. We are sworn to discretion and confidentiality when it comes to these things."

"So you won't be telling me, are you?"

"I'm afraid I can't disclose it, ma'am."

"And you think I can't find out for myself, huh? Anyway, thank you. Sayonara, Toshigawa-WHAT-E-VER!" She slammed the phone down, breathing angrily.

She walked out of her office and turned to the secretary.

"Cancel all my appointments, Mika-san. I'm going to be out for the whole day."

She took a taxi to the hospital to find out all she can about the case.

Yesterday, she thought. If she only made a move yesterday…

"_Are you sure about this, Kinomoto-san?" The doctor asked Touya._

"_Hai, sensei…" He answered flatly. Meiling's heart broke for him._

"_Well, then, you have to sign these papers, sir —"_

_The baby's cries drowned the rest of the doctor's words._

_She saw Touya clap his hands over his ears, closing his eyes._

"_Make her stop, please make her stop crying!"_

_The doctor silently beckoned one of the nurses to take his daughter away before shoving the papers in his hands, the papers for adoption consent. He stopped for a moment before he signed them._

"_That's all right, Kinomoto-san. Now…" But Touya didn't pause to listen to him. He walked out and said without turning,_

"_I shall be going now, sensei. Arigatou Gozaimasu."_

_She dialed furiously when Touya was gone and headed for the entrance and asked for a baby put up for adoption, introducing herself as Mrs. Meiling Yin._

"I was a fool…" Meiling said, thinking of where the baby might be now.

She dialed a number in her mobile.

"Hai. This is Meiling. I want you to trace the whereabouts of a child put up for adoption yesterday from Tokyo H. The father is Touya Kinomoto. Yeah, biological. That's all I know. I want the results tomorrow."

"What do you mean, not possible?" Meiling so nearly screamed. "I…can't you do it faster?"

_Why did you give her away, Touya?_ She thought as she decided to go elsewhere. She won't be able to work properly.

She ended up in a restaurant for lunch that day. She scourged the mall and bought dresses she didn't want and need but she didn't care. She spent a huge chunk of money buying a lot of things on a whim. Finally, tired and desperate, she stopped by a low-profile bar and drank to her heart's content.

Then she saw him enter the bar. The room was suddenly small. The alcohol she had consumed seemed only to heighten her senses, make her fully aware of her presence. All night long, she watched him throw away his precious yens on low-class drinks until he can't seem to stand anymore. She had stopped ordering drinks and just watched him drown in sorrows. When he kept ordering even without the money for it, she discreetly told the bar manager to keep giving him drinks and that she'll pay for it.

When he had enough, he walked out of the bar with empty pockets. She followed suit and went inside the limousine.

--

Touya ended up in a bar that night. He was stinking drunk, having emptied his pockets for all the booze he could get. Now he had no money to head home. Not that he wanted to. The least thing he wanted was to get suffocated by Kaho's memories.

_Touya…_

_Touya…_

_Touya…_

_I must really be drunk, _he thought, _to hear Kaho's voice._

"Come and take me, Kaho! Take me with you…to heaven!" He slurred the words out as he walked right on to the center of the road. He saw headlights from the corner of his eye. He closed his eyes and prepared for the impact and the feeling of dying, but none came. He opened his eyes to see a black, gleaming limo parked before him. He frowned. It looked familiar even in his drunken state.

"Hop in, Touya." It was a woman's voice.

And just then, he forgot his drunken stupor, when he saw who it was.

Li Meiling, the spoiled brat.

--

"No, thanks," his voice sounded clear enough, and her heart skipped a beat.

"Come on, you're drunk and…"

"How do you know? Have been stalking me, then?"

"What would you say if I said I did?"

"Nothing, since I can't do anything about it."

He started to walk away, taking with him that momentary warmth that enveloped her heart.

"Matte."

He didn't turn.

"I said wait a moment, baka!" _If it's anger that would keep you sane, then so be it._

But that didn't solicit reaction from him.

_He just lost the will to live…Somehow, I still envy you, Kaho. Why does he throw everything away for you?_

She walked out of the limo and ran towards his retreating back.

"Didn't you hear me?"

"I heard you. Loud and clear. I'm not drunk, so I'm going home."

"Come on, I know you don't have the money to do so."

"No, thanks."

"Please don't do this to yourself; if Kaho was alive —" He stopped walking and she nearly walked on him. He turned and with blazing eyes held her arms with a viselike grip.

"If Kaho was alive we won't be having this conversation! I'll be home with her and…Just butt out of my life, get it?"

"No, I don't get it. I don't get why you're wasting away. I don't get why you don't want to live anymore. So, can you explain why? Then maybe I'll leave you alone."

"You're still nosy as ever."

"So, how about telling me those reasons while going home?"

"Clever as ever, Meiling."

"Of course. So what about that car ride?"

--

Reluctantly, a smile formed in his lips. It was the first since Kaho died. Meiling smiled at him in triumph.

_I made him smile, _she thought as she entered the car.

_She's really stubborn._

That was the last thought on his mind before everything went black.

A/N: Lemon next time, then full drama to the hilt. Ha-ha. Evil me.

Cold Fire's up next, maybe tomorrow or later. Depends.


	4. Chapter 2: Mistake

My Happy Ending

Witch-Mistress-Animaru

A/N: Oh, sweet, sweet life…Fanfiction mode again…and I missed MHW so much that I'm updating its sequel. What do you think of this segue?

Warning before you go on reading: This is a Lemon Chapter.

_Once upon a time, there lived a queen whose cold demeanor was created by the emptiness around her. The reason behind this coldness is a king she loved, a king married to a beautiful, kind queen. She had resigned herself to remain an empty shell, until fate took things in its hands: The queen died, leaving the king all alone._

_Does happiness have a chance for the lonely queen of ice?_

2: Mistake

_Light has shone in the temple of darkness_

_The priestess awaits the coming of the god_

_She has offered poison to the goddess_

_And she died, died, died_

_The beloved goddess was no more_

_And she was free to offer her heart_

_To her most revered, lonesome god_

Meiling didn't want to take him home just yet. Call it greed, call it selfishness, but she still wanted to spend time with him. She believed that Kami-sama has given her the chance, and that she should take it.

"Hey," she said, full of energy and giddiness.

"Hmm?" His voice was slurred and hazy, and she giggled like a child all of a sudden, hearing him speak like that.

"I know a place where they serve good booze." She giggled again, although a bit halfheartedly this time. What if he said no?

"That…by far…is the best thing you've said all day…"

She smiled, the worry gone from her face.

"Hitachi, take us to _Spritzu.__" _She ordered her driver. "You'll love it there, Touya…"

Truth was, she had never been there. She heard it from some of their employees. Spritzu has quite a following there, what with its legendary reputation as a drunkard's haven. Alcoholic drinks cheaper than any you'd find…

"Where, ma'am?"

"_Spritzu_, I said. Don't tell me you don't know the place?"

"Ano…Meiling-sama, I don't think that's a good idea…why don't we just take your friend home?"

"Do I pay you good money to say what you think?" She snapped, feeling irritable. "Just drive, dammit!"

"Meiling-sama, listen to me…"

"No, you listen — you drive or you're fired!"

"Meiling-sama…" Hitachi looked stricken by her threat, breathed deeply, weighing out his options. She knew Hitachi needed this job badly, with his sickly wife and only son left at home. Besides, he had been her driver since she was a kid. She felt rather guilty after issuing the threat, but he had to take her to _Spritzu._ He had to.

He sighed dejectedly, slowing the car down.

"You aren't thinking clearly, Meiling-sama. Let's go home."

"Oh, dear, Hitachi…don't you care much for your job?" She glanced sideways at Touya, who wasn't even sober enough to butt in their conversation.

"I care for my job, Meiling-sama, that I don't wish to think of tomorrow…if you will fire me. But I care more for you, Meiling-sama. I will do you a great disservice if I do as you say now."

She froze. Of course, Hitachi would only want what's best for her — he was almost, almost family. She turned her full gaze to the man who caused her state of momentary craziness — Touya Kinomoto. She felt shame and bitterness when she realized what she was doing…

He was already asleep, she noted. Yet she did not even know where he lived now. She had no idea what became of him after he married Kaho Mizuki.

Not until Syaoran and Sakura got together again.

She made her decision then.

"Let's go home, Hitachi," she said in a small voice. "You're right, I wasn't thinking clearly."

"Which house, ma'am?"

"To my condominium unit in Tokyo." She sighed. "I'm going to sleep for a bit. Wake me when we're there."

When they arrived there, she asked Hitachi to help her take Touya upstairs. Hitachi only hesitated a bit, and when he decided that Touya was too drunk to do her any harm, he agreed. Then he bid her goodnight and left for the Li Mansion just a few streets away.

She closed the door shut before turning to Touya, who was lying in the couch, totally asleep. She smiled sadly, tears forming in her eyes as she thought of what transpired between them years and years ago — when she was a mere teenager, a kid in his eyes.

She went inside her room and changed her clothes. Then she went and attended to him. She wet a towel and sponged his face gently.

He looked so small, like a child, lying there in her couch. Tenderness surged in her heart. Who knows what will happen tomorrow? Yet she knew, somehow, that he will go on pretending not to know her at all, even when he wakes up in her house.

She gazed at his arresting face — the dark brows, the sharp lines of his face, the well-formed lips she so longed to kiss…

She gave in to the temptation, knowing it will be her most cherished secret until she died.

The moment her lips touched his, it was bliss. His lips were surprisingly soft and tender against her, cool and unyielding. He reeked of alcohol, but it only heightened her senses.

But before she could bring it to an end, his lips moved beneath hers. Surprised, she began to pull away, but before she could do so, his hand shot up and pulled her down the couch with him.

Her gasp was silenced by his lips, smothering it in her throat. His hands were around her waist, melding her against him.

Yet his eyes remained closed.

"T-Touya," she gasped out the moment his lips left hers. She thought it was over, and that he was asleep once more…

…but she was mistaken when his hands moved up to cup her breasts.

She gasped loudly as his hands fondled and caressed, squeezing and kneading.

"Are you awake, Touya?" She whispered. He didn't respond, but his hands were busy exploring her body. One hand fumbled on the buttons of her business suit and removed it with expertise.

She was lost. What the heck was happening?

**Touya was dreaming. **He was making love with Kaho…and it was all too real for him. He could feel her satiny skin, her silken hair...

His lips sought hers…Oh, God, he had forgotten how sweet those lips were.

She was naked under him now, and his hands explored her body as they always did.

He was naked, as well. The sensation was overwhelming — they were skin to skin, his body molding against hers.

His hand moved down her center of femininity, petting her, stroking her. A delicious purr escaped her, causing him to laugh throatily…

**Meiling** was lost in the sensations that Touya's lovemaking made her feel. His hands invaded places nobody has ever been before. One, two fingers slipped inside her., causing her to writhe deliciously beneath him. She was surprised to find they were no longer at the couch, but on the carpeted floor.

Only when his knees began to nudge her thighs apart not-so-gently did it dawn to her what was really happening. She had a split-second to decide whether to go on with it or say no.

But before she could voice out her decision, he already thrust forward, piercing her, tearing her apart that she cried out in pain.

**Touya **opened his eyes at the shrill sound that pierced his ears. Only to look down at a familiar-unfamiliar figure lying underneath him, naked.

_Shit._ He saw tears spring from Meiling's eyes, the discomfort in them in their joining.

Double shit.

So, the erotic dream wasn't a dream, after all.

He glanced around at the unfamiliar surroundings. Where was he?

He almost forgot what was going on until he heard her sniffle.

Guiltily, he turned back to her. His hand moved to dry the solitary tear from her eye.

She started, her eyes wide and innocent as they gazed up at him.

He somehow felt he had to go on with it — he owed it to her.

He'll ask his questions later, think of the consequences later, get mad if necessary later.

With that thought in his mind, he bent his head and kissed her hungrily, his tongue mimicking the sex act itself, moving in and out of her surprisingly sweet lips. His one hand went down to where their bodies joined and petted her there to somehow ease her discomfort.

She has always been attractive to him, but she was forbidden territory, being a lot younger than he was. Besides, he has always been in love with Kaho.

_No, I'm not thinking of her now,_ he thought as he thrust in and out of her.

**Meiling** felt like she was climbing up high in a spiral ride to heaven with each thrust. She was hardly aware that she was clutching his head against hers as their lips met, or that his hands were on her breasts and _there,_ fondling and caressing. She was hardly aware of her muffled screams and whimpers against his lips.

On that final thrust, Touya let go of her lips and her cry echoed around the room as Touya finished as well.

A moment later, he dropped against her chest in exhaustion.

It hardly mattered that he was heavy. At least he was awake while he did all those things to her and he would remember it as she did.

He was very much sober, she knew. And as the compelling moment they shared faded to nothing, she could feel his tension build up.

He rolled off her and stood up, picking up his clothes scattered around them.

"How did I come to be here?" He asked in an indifferent voice belying the intimacy they just shared. Meiling fought off the urge to cry.

"I saw you on my way home, you were too drunk and I'm afraid you nearly passed out."

"Why am I here?"

"I don't know where you live," she answered, hoping she could hold back the tears threatening to fall.

"Convenient," he muttered, the sarcasm flowing back to his voice.

"But it's true, damn you! I…I didn't' mean this to happen —"

"Don't waste your breath," he said disgustedly. "The lengths you would go to just to have me is overwhelming. How come I am not flattered?"

"Bastard!" She screamed out, forgetting her nakedness as she stood up to face him. "How conceited can you get, Touya? You don't mean a whit to me."

"Really? Forgive me if I doubt that,, but my past experience with you tells me otherwise." He said bitingly and Meiling felt her cheeks redden when she remembered what transpired years and years ago.

"Damn you," she whispered, trying to ease the pain in her chest. Why must his bitterness ruin everything? She didn't mean it to happen. Yet it did. It was not as if she initiated it. She only wanted to steal a kiss to remember him by.

"Isn't it true, Miss Li?" He asked tauntingly.

"Get out, Touya, before I throw you out myself!"

"Oh, I will. But before that…" He swung around to face her and forcefully pulled him against his clothed form. Before she knew it, his lips were brutally covering hers in a punishing kiss. "Your lips are unexpectedly sweet, considering how sharp your tongue is. And since you're so eager to have me, why not let's have a little arrangement? I can come and go as I please."

"Damn you, I won't be your whore," she spat out, hoping he didn't notice her body's reaction to the nearness of their bodies.

"No, you're much worse than that," he said savagely. "But you're a good fuck, Meiling, I'll give you as much as that." He said and before she could retort sharply, his lips were on hers again and his hands were squeezing her uncovered breasts tightly, too painfully that she squealed her pain.

"Don't you like that?" He taunted, brushing his forefinger on her taut nipples.

"Fuck you!" She nearly screamed out. Didn't he realize he just took her innocence? But then, she couldn't blame him. Her past behavior toward him caused this reaction to her.

"That's what you'll be doing when I come here, sugar," he said the endearment mockingly while his hands violated her body. She hated how she responded to his savage bordering on sadistic exploration of her body, making her feel like a common whore. "What's the matter? Isn't this what you wanted before? Well, I'm free to give it to you now, so there's no need to be so shy."

Her hand landed neatly on his cheek with a sound slap.

"No need for such violence, Meiling. Don't' dare do that again, or I just might hit you back." He said coldly. "Don't worry — I can find a good many other whores to please me. You aren't exactly the best. Not even among the better." He added brutally before walking out of the door, leaving her aghast.

She fell down the carpet and wept and wept.

Why must he be so…brutish?

She wiped her tears and her throbbing lips as she stood up.

She had him, all right. But she must never have him again…

…for her own sake.

TBC

A/N: You need to watch out in the next chapters to understand why Touya reacted like that. See you in next chapter, tentatively entitled 'Addicted.'


	5. Chapter 3: Addicted

My Happy Ending

Witch-Mistress-Animaru

A/N: Here goes another chapter of this angsty, angsty story. I only realized how heavy this one was. I loved last chapter so much, did you know that? Only it's hard to make an update; thank yon gods of rain for this update — Dodong and Egay, I think (grins).

_Once upon a time, there lived a queen whose cold demeanor was created by the emptiness around her. The reason behind this coldness is a king she loved, a king married to a beautiful, kind queen. She had resigned herself to remain an empty shell, until fate took things in its hands: The queen died, leaving the king all alone._

_Does happiness have a chance for the lonely queen of ice?_

3: Addicted

_The priestess offered, the god had taken_

_In the darkened night they had stolen_

_Moments of bliss, moments forbidden_

_To mortals and gods alike_

_Yet when the dawn has broken and the punishment meted out_

_The god left his loving priestess_

_To rest in his sacred abode and wallow in misery_

_For the mistress he had lost, the goddess he revered_

_And thought not of the mortal who gave herself to him_

_And there he stayed all day long_

_But when night broke again_

_Covering the earth with its mysteries_

_He came down again_

_Seeking the remedy only the priestess can give_

She was a fool.

Meiling sat still on her bed, clutching her feet as she curled up there, trying to ignore the stabbing pains at her heart. The tears fell everytime she remembered Touya's parting words.

"_Your lips are unexpectedly sweet, considering how sharp your tongue is. And since you're so eager to have me, why not let's have a little arrangement? I can come and go as I please."_

"_But you're a good fuck, Meiling, I'll give you as much as that."_

"_Fuck you!" She nearly screamed out. Didn't he realize he just took her innocence? But then, she couldn't blame him. Her past behavior toward him caused this reaction to her._

"_That's what you'll be doing when I come here, sugar," he said the endearment mockingly while his hands violated her body. She hated how she responded to his savage bordering on sadistic exploration of her body, making her feel like a common whore. "What's the matter? Isn't this what you wanted before? Well, I'm free to give it to you now, so there's no need to be so shy."_

_Her hand landed neatly on his cheek with a sound slap._

"_No need for such violence, Meiling. Don't' dare do that again, or I just might hit you back." He said coldly. "Don't worry — I can find a good many other whores to please me. You aren't exactly the best. Not even among the better." He added brutally before walking out of the door, leaving her aghast._

"Touya..." she whispered his name, as if it would bring him back.

She had been this way for the whole three days since he slammed the door of her apartment, leaving her to lick her wounds.

Her eyes were swollen, puffy and red. Eye bags circled her face while her hair was a mess.

She had not gone to work in those three days. She knew Syaoran was bound to call her soon for neglecting her duties.

Or maybe not. Maybe she'll just stay here forever, trapped in her misery eternally...

...After what he had said, what he had said, misery was a prospect she welcomed with open arms.

Maybe oblivion wasn't such a bad idea...

Then the door of her bedroom opened to reveal her cousin-in-law, Kinomoto Sakura.

No, that was her maiden name. She is now Li Sakura.

But that doesn't change the fact that she is Touya's brother.

Her mind was puzzled faintly at why Sakura was there in her house, in her room, but that was all.

She didn't feel anything else. That was good.

---

Sakura gazed at Meiling worriedly. She always looked so tough that Sakura wasn't used to seeing her break down.

"What the hell's going on, Meiling?" Syaoran shouted from behind her. He was carrying Xiao Chen, who had fallen asleep on the ride to Meiling's house.

She eyed her husband reproachfully as she approached her cousin-in-law.

"What have you been doing to yourself, Meiling-chan?" She whispered softly as she approached her. The room was a mess. The bed's covers were rumpled; several articles of clothing were strewn on the floor.

Meiling's eyes regarded her with a blankness which frightened her.

"What the —? Meiling, what happened here?" Syaoran had entered the threshold of her room and he blanched at his cousin's state. He handed his son's sleeping form to his wife and approached his cousin. "Three days, my God. What have you been doing in three days? Practicing to be a hermit?" He shook Meiling's shoulders despite Sakura's protests. "Meiling!" He turned to his wife when he received no response. "Check around if she took anything she shouldn't be drinking." Sakura nodded and scourged the place for any indication that Meiling took some medicine, but there was none. She sighed and shook her head.

"Good, now, Meiling, tell me what happened." Syaoran said, forcing his cousin to face him.

But Meiling only shook her head and smiled flatly.

"I'm okay, Syao," she said, looking the very opposite of her claim. She lowered her eyes. "I'm just a bit off-peak these days..."

"Lies. You dare tell me lies?" Syaoran gazed at her face then breathed, "It's about a guy, isn't it? Tell me about it so I can beat the hell out of that gutless lowlife who dumped you!"

Meiling laughed at that remark. Somehow, she found the idea of Syaoran thrashing Touya laughable.

"Don't be too worried about me. I'll be fine in a day or two. You two," she straightened up and her gaze was just as stern as ever, "shouldn't even be here. You should be going away on some honeymoon...You only just got back together."

"Don't say that. Of course we can't not worry about you." Sakura said. "You're family, Meiling."

_But he's your brother, Sakura,_ Meiling wanted to say. _Your brother dumped me, got that?_

"I want you to get a hold of yourself, Mei," Syaoran said autocratically. "I want you up and about by tomorrow, or else we're going to do something about this."

"And how do you plan to do that?" She said softly, smiling a bit for the first time in days.

"Money talks, remember? I can easily hire someone to find out who's that jerk who..."

Meiling's smile faded at that point. "Don't you dare, Li Syaoran! I just might never forgive you, you hear me?"

"Well, you better make sure you report to work tomorrow with at least a professional, no-nonsense disposition. Got that?"

Meiling snorted, smiling automatically. Her cousin had his ways of cheering her up. She nodded at them both, feeling happy yet envious of their obvious love for each other.

She was almost going to cry. Almost.

But Syaoran had set the old Meiling back to motion.

_No, I'm not going to cry and weep and pine after him. The world will continue to spin without him. He's behind me now._

"We'll be going, then, Meiling. Are you quite sure you're okay?" Sakura was still frowning slightly at her. She was stroking her son's hair absently as Syaoran stood up and pulled her away.

"Yes, I'm okay, Sakura, don't worry yourself. And Syaoran," she called her cousin, who turned.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." He nodded knowingly, took Xiao Chen from Sakura and pulled her with him out of the room.

She heard the two arguing playfully as they exited her room.

She sighed, straightening up. She grimaced as she saw the mess she had made for three days. She had to clean up.

_I'm over you. I'm so over you, I'll show you._

---

Touya entered his house and dropped his exhausted form on the bed. He had been to work for the first time in the weeks since Kaho had died. It seemed that he had finally moved on. Though not exactly true, he has stopped his stupid drinking spree and attended work.

He still hasn't smiled a bit and his demeanor was a bit grumpy, but it's a start.

He was recovering.

He closed his eyes, willing himself to sleep. He was apprehensive of Kaho appearing in his dreams again now that he's alone.

Instead, an unbidden image rose from the depths of his mind. Fiery eyes, raven hair flowing freely around her face. An uncertain, deceptively innocent smile on her lips, as if inviting him to kiss them.

_Damn._ He stood up and headed for the shower. Without removing his clothes, he stepped under the shower and opened it full blast.

After he had changed his clothes a few minutes later, Touya opened his cooler to search for a six-pack, but there was none left of his stock.

The door slammed shut a second time that night as he went out.

---

Meiling stepped out of the Li building, clutching a couple of folders to her breast. She was back to work again. She was waiting for the limousine she used when she saw someone move in the shadows. Startled, she looked up.

And saw him. The face which haunted her nights — be it in dreams or nightmares.

Kinomoto Touya was staring at her intently.

He approached her. She could not move.

She would not move. Until a sardonic smile appeared in his lips, and Meiling knew his presence meant trouble.

"What do you want?" She asked, her voice the merest whisper.

"Do I need to answer that?" His eyes danced maliciously as he gazed at her, first at the face then moving suggestively to her bosom.

"You..." she started indignantly. How dare he think that she's going to let him do it again to her!

"Don't be a hypocrite. you know we both wanted it." He pulled her to him and she tried to pull away in turn.

His grip slackened at the very moment the limousine halted in front of them. Glaring at him, Meiling nearly ran to get inside the car.

Her heart thudded against her chest. Her face was flushed.

She knew he was right.

But she knew it was wrong.

_I won't play your stupid game, Touya. Never again._

TBC

A/N: Next chapter might be another lemon. The marriage just might take place soon as well.


	6. Chapter 4: Complications

My Happy Ending

Witch-Mistress-Animaru

A/N: Shame is me, for letting this rot in my PC. By the way, haven't you noticed that most of my stories' protagonists involve some godforsaken writer? Meiling in this one is a good writer, albeit a suppressed one, so it isn't really her profession.

And don't you notice that in Everything You Want and Finding Love (hell, I forgot Catch Me If You Can) both the protagonists are writing something, and that something somehow ends up in my story (like _A Twist in Paradise, Searching for me, etc…_)?

So goes for this one. There's another "excerpt" here, because I just love making my characters talk just when they are alone and most honest with their feelings and preconceptions—that is, when they write down their ideas on a piece of paper, unknowing that someday, someone might come across their hidden thoughts and premises of the world…

And didn't you notice I was advertising said stories to you? Lolz.

On with the story, then…I'm sorry for the lengthy epitaphs and introductions.

4: Complications

"_Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."_

_**-Semisonic, Closing Time**_

_**Once upon a time, there lived a queen whose cold demeanor was created by the emptiness around her. The reason behind this coldness is a king she loved, a king married to a beautiful, kind queen. She had resigned herself to remain an empty shell, until fate took things in its hands: The queen died, leaving the king all alone.**_

_**Does happiness have a chance for the lonely queen of ice?**_

"_Don't we all love complications in the plot of a story? We secretly loved Cinderella's slavery to her stepfamily, for we know a moment will come when everything will change. How we love the thrill of frustration over some obstacle, thinking, "come on, things will have to be better than that!" And oh, the triumph is just overwhelmingly intoxicating, that feeling we have after a nice twist in the plot makes everything all right._

_However, sometimes, complications seem to be all we have page after page that it soon gets annoying. Complications that seem to go on forever, never to be solved, and will always remain in the path of the happy ending you were craving for…such is how it feels to undergo these obstructions._

_Now that I think of it…complications may make every story interesting, but in real life they're nothing but plain old bummers to live through. I certainly have no wish to be Cinderella cleaning after my stepsisters' mess when I can be with the prince of my life. I'd rather skip the grueling part and dash to the happily ever after waiting for me somewhere down there._

_And in real life, complications don't just arise in the point of climax—they come without warning, and follow the adage "when it rains, it pours…" just when you don't need another one in your life…"_

_**-excerpts from Li Meiling's very secret notebook, entitled "On Complications"**_

Two weeks passed after Meiling left the Li building to find Kinomoto Touya waiting for her outside. Two weeks have passed since their unspeakable encounter.

And Meiling had, just for the moment, forgotten what it felt like to be with him. Her heart had dulled from its earlier, throbbing ache to a numb device working to keep her alive.

She was working overtime all week, trying to drown herself on all the paperwork and stress just to forget everything.

Her cousin Li Syaoran and his charming wife Sakura were growing all the more worried about her. She was the first to arrive in the office and the last to leave, everyday.

And really, her body can only take too much torture.

She got up fine, alright. However, there was that teensiest bit of dizziness she felt as she rose from bed, which she attributed to her lack of sleep and constant overwork. Dismissing the weird sensation as nothing but signs of her overstress, she got up and performed her daily morning activities like some living zombie.

However, by lunchtime, her daily dose of work has taken its heavy toll on her.

Having consumed nothing but a glass of fresh milk for breakfast, Meiling noted the way her hands shook as she signed paper after paper that Mika-san delivered in her office.

Before she could decide what she would be ordering for lunch, though, Meiling fainted then and there, just as Mika-san was about to deliver another set of contracts to her boss.

"Li-sama!" Mika shrieked out, dropping the sheaf of papers as she dashed to catch Meiling before she fell just in time. With some difficulty, Mika settled her immediate boss's unconscious form on the couch in the waiting room and dialed Li Syaoran's number immediately.

"Konnichiwa, Li speaking," he said in a hurried tone, and Mika stuttered badly as she spoke to the big boss.

"Ano, Li-sama, t-this is Mika Kawamura, i-it's a-about Li Meilin-sama…"

"What about her? She forgot to take her lunch again?"

"Ano…she fainted, Li-sama…"

"What? Where is she now?"

"At her office, sir…I laid her on the couch…and…" Mika's voice trailed off as she noted that Li Syaoran was not listening anymore.

"Damn," he swore and dropped the call.

Minutes later, Li Syaoran came dashing inside Meiling's office, his very worried wife behind him.

"Oh, Meiling-chan, what have you done to yourself this time?" Sakura asked as her husband carried Meiling and sprinted outside. Sakura handed out instructions to Mika and ensured that the office was in order before she followed her husband in the company ambulance already waiting outside.

A short while thereafter, they arrived at the nearest clinic and Meiling underwent tests immediately.

Sakura and Syaoran waited in bated breath outside until the doctor went out and spoke to them.

"Well…she's just woken up. Overwork, it's what it is. Fatigue and stress taking their toll on her…I suggest she take lighter loads of work, especially given her delicate condition. I've questioned her a bit just now and it's a good thing she hasn't been taking caffeinated drinks and food, and that she's not in the habit of cigarettes and alcohol…that would have been very fatal sided with stress," the doctor explained this very rapidly that husband and wife stared at him for a full minute before asking him to repeat what he said, _slowly_.

"Oh…I just said that stress won't do well for pregnant women, neither do caffeine and alcohol and nicotine…" The doctor looked at them as if they've gone dumb. "I can't give her any prescription because I'm not an obstetrician, so it's not my expertise. But I can recommend a trusted colleague of mine in that line, if you'd follow me."

But both Sakura and Syaoran had gone numb with shock, with Sakura first to recover.

"Meiling-chan is pregnant?!" She shrieked as she stared at her husband's grim face, telling her that whoever the perpetrator was, he won't take kindly to what Syaoran thought of him at the moment.

Syaoran looked ready to kill Meiling's lover, whoever he was.

--

Meiling was in shock. Of all the stupid, rotten luck she had, why did that chance encounter she had with Touya bring so many problems she can do without?

And to think it happened only once…she wanted to laugh sarcastically. How she used to dream of this moment…when she'd bear his child in her womb, but this wasn't exactly how she'd envisioned it. In her dreams, Touya would be beside her to hear the good news, holding her hand as if to encourage her and share with her the joys of pregnancy.

However, that contradicted the image of Touya leaving her apartment with nothing but cold and harsh words, a bitter sort of reality meant to wake her up.

And now she didn't know what to do…

She was still staring unseeingly ahead when the door opened and Syaoran barged in unceremoniously. Sakura hovered by the doorway, unsure if she wanted to see her husband strangling his (never admittedly) most precious cousin to get the truth out of her. Sakura probably decided it was best she stayed to keep Syaoran's temper in check, for she stepped inside cautiously and closed the door behind her.

Really, these two are the dearest people in her life, but enough was enough, especially with Syaoran's meddling ways.

"Meiling Li," Syaoran said in a dangerously low voice. "You better explain yourself right now, or else."

"I think," Meiling said cautiously, "that you are overstepping yourself this time, Xiao Lang."

"How dare you say that? We're family, Meiling!"

"Don't you think I haven't realized that by now? Mind your own business, cousin, and leave me be."

"Look where that stubborn stint of yours got you! You will tell me who the goddamned father is, Meiling, even if I have to choke the information out of you."

"No, I won't, and don't ever try to use your money and connections to find him, or else…"

"What have I got to lose?"

"I never questioned your decision to part ways with Sakura before, Xiao Lang, even if I knew you were making a grave mistake," she countered softly. "Won't you let me live my life the way I want it this time?"

Sakura shifted uneasily in her seat but said nothing. She agreed with her meddling husband for once—Meiling needed someone to be with her during her pregnancy.

However, she wanted to give Meiling the privacy to manage her own affairs, so she spoke up.

"Meiling-chan…I appreciate what you are trying to tell us," Sakura started softly. "And I promise I'd dissuade him from doing anything rash…"

"…if you promise us that you'd contact him, whoever he is, and tell him of your condition."

Meiling started to argue, but Sakura put up her hand.

"Pregnancy isn't an easy thing, Meiling-chan… many times I have wished that Syaoran was with me while I was expecting Xiao Chen. It isn't easy for a pregnant woman to be alone, believe me. You'd need all the help you can get. He owes you that much, Meiling-chan." Sakura was pleading with her, trying to make sense with her.

"I…promise to inform him," she said, and Meiling knew she would honor her word. After all, she would never cheat Touya of something so important.

"Thank you. It's for the best, Meiling. Now, if you are okay, we can go."

"Okay," she said, nodding absently. _How was she going to explain to Touya?_

"And…" Syaoran was determined to have the last word. "…you're barred from your office from now until after you give birth!"

"No, Xiao Lang, damn it, I need to work…" …_to forget him…_Tears formed in Meiling's eyes as she argued with her cousin that Syaoran was rendered speechless.

_It must be hormones,_ she thought as she viciously wiped out her eyes.

"All right," he sighed. "You can work for the first few weeks or so, but no more than four to five hours. Absolutely no staying at work after office hours. Get that?"

It was enough for Meiling.

"Thank you, both of you…" And the trio went to leave after taking the obstetrician's address.

Syaoran dropped his cousin at her house before he drove back to the office. Sakura decided to stay a bit before returning to the office. But just before they parted, Syaoran took his wife aside and talked to her.

"Is this wise, Sakura, letting her do it herself?"

"She's strong…she'll get through this alive. She needs to do this alone, Syaoran," Sakura said softly. "Believe me…she'd tell us who he is when she's good and ready."

"But…"

"No buts," Sakura said and brushed her lips lightly on his. "Trust me on this, sweetheart. You're so used on doing things on your own. Let us girls be on charge for once."

"All right, I trust your judgment. Just make sure she doesn't mess up." With that, Syaoran crushed her lips with his on a much more passionate kiss before driving away.

--

Meiling couldn't help but shake her head as she saw the two kissing briefly before Syaoran drove away. They were the perfect couple, she decided years ago when she first met Sakura, who was such a darling even then, as she and Syaoran faced and defied the elders and married each other anyway. (A/N: point of reference: My Husband's Wedding, The Mystery Part 4)

…_And her overbearing brother…_

Meiling remembered it so well. How she first met Kinomoto Touya…

_She was so surprised when her cousin contacted her that fateful day. She was doing some accounting for the company that day when the call came through, and a very excited Xiao Lang spoke to her._

"_I need you to come to Tomoeda Church immediately, Mei," he used her pet name for once, causing her to raise one eyebrow in speculation._

"_What is this about? Are you going to confess your sins to father Fujiyama?"_

"_No, silly, Sakura and I are getting married!"_

_So she made her way, rather hurriedly, to the church. She immediately saw Syaoran and Sakura…_

…_then she saw a tall, handsome man standing beside Sakura and she forgot everyone else. He had raven hair and unsmiling, characteristically sharp gray eyes and an overbearing demeanor, judging by the scowl on his face and his folded arms. The first she thought of was how wonderful it would be for this man to protect her, then she realized that Sakura was calling her._

_She approached cautiously. That was when she found out that the man was none other than Kinomoto Touya, Sakura's older brother. He was also standing witness on the wedding, though it was obvious that he disapproved of it._

_She tried speaking to him, but he stared at her rather dispassionately and said, "Spare me the flirtations, young lady. Find someone else to toy around with," and left her without another word._

_Yet his words fascinated her all the more… she was always one who never back down from a challenge._

Meiling was roused from her stupor by the ring of the phone.

"Hello?" She answered dully, but she straightened up upon recognizing the voice.

"Mrs. Yin Meiling?" It was the investigator she hired. "We found the couple who adopted the child Kinomoto…"

She held her breath.

"Here's the address …"

She quickly jotted it down, all her resolve to forget about Touya forgotten…

TBC

A/N: How will she get Kazuki back? How will she tell Touya? How will he react? Believe me, these questions plague me as well. Until the next chapter—by the way, I just wanted to tell you just how badly I want to update all the fics that have been stagnant here, for a long time. I just can't do it all at once. So just wait…as always, that's my mantra. Just wait.

We'll get there, somehow.


	7. Chapter 5: Troubles

**My Happy Ending**

**Witch-Mistress-Animaru**

A/N: Okay. I can smell the stench of a rotting story (no, several stories for that matter) in my PC. I had to do something.

5: Troubles

"_You and I got something_

_But it's all and then it's nothing to me_

_And I got my defenses_

_When it comes to your intentions for me…_

_I'm not the one who broke you_

_I'm not the one you should fear._

_And I want to get free, talk to me_

_I can feel you falling_

_And I wanted to be all you need_

_But somehow here is gone."_

_**Goo Goo Dolls, Here is Gone**_

_**Once upon a time, there lived a queen whose cold demeanor was created by the emptiness around her. The reason behind this coldness is a king she loved, a king married to a beautiful, kind queen. She had resigned herself to remain an empty shell, until fate took things in its hands: The queen died, leaving the king all alone.**_

_**Does happiness have a chance for the lonely queen of ice?**_

"_So I found her. I found Kaho Mizuki's daughter. Now I don't know how I can return her to her papa because, if truth be told, I love her already. And I can't bear the hurt of parting ways with one I love…all over again…_

_Besides, I can't even bring myself to tell him I'm having his kid…"_

_**-excerpts from Li Meiling's very secret notebook **_

"You have to eat, sweetheart," she whispered to the baby in her arms. Holding a bottle of warm milk in her hands, she tried to feed the restless angel she held dearly against her chest, but to no avail. The baby just kept on crying. "What am I going to do with you?"

Her chest tightened as she soothed the baby, cradling her as gently as she could. "Don't cry, I'm not mad at you…I'm just…so worried. Why won't you stop being sad?"

The baby wailed in reply.

"I don't even know what to call you yet," she said shakily. "I know they called you only aka-chan, but I think you deserve a name now."

The baby only cried even more.

"Oh, please stop crying…mama…do you want your mama? But she's…she can't be with you anymore," she whispered.

The baby's cries grew louder.

"Oh, don't cry, please. I'll be your mama if that's what you want, but…sooner or later you'll have to go to your papa and I'll leave you with him."

The baby's cries began to falter.

"It's what you want, is it? To have your mama… Well, then. I'll be your mama, for now. Mama is here, little one. She's just a bit upset because you're about to have a brother…or is it a sister?—and aka-chan is playing with mama's emotions. I don't really know, sweetheart, but you're going to be a big sister soon…"

Silence. Looking down at the child in her arms, Meiling saw that she was asleep. Sighing, she hugged the baby closer.

"What am I to do with you? The longer I keep you with me, the harder it is for me to let you go…"

Then and there, she knew that she had to tell Touya. And soon.

_You're not mine to keep, sweetheart. You're his, and Kaho's._

---

The next morning, she dressed Touya's daughter with care, preparing her for her meeting with her father.

She could still remember the broken look on Touya's face when he gave up his daughter in bitterness over his wife's death. While she was sure that he won't shun the child away, she can't tell how he'd react on her interference.

Or when he finds out she's pregnant.

They didn't exactly part ways as friends, considering that last, heated moment they shared. As she remembered, he stormed out after spitting out hateful words at her. As such, she could hardly phone him without worrying about him slamming down the phone on her.

Strengthening her resolve, Meiling squared her shoulders and fought a wave of nausea that has nothing to do with morning sickness.

She reached the entrance of the building, several employees gazing at her. Some of them knew her—perhaps they were wondering why she was carrying a child in her arms.

"Miss Li," one of them greeted. "I'm afraid Mrs. Li isn't around just yet."

"I'm not here to see Sakura," she said, shaking her head. "I was wondering, is Touya in?"

"Sorry, Li-san, but the boss has orders not to be disturbed."

"I…well, it's important. I'll go in now, so you don't need to announce me."

"But…" Before the employee could answer, she was already walking away.

She reached his office at record time. Sighing, she knocked on the door.

"Come in," came the muffled reply. She took another deep breath before pushing the door open.

Touya was buried in paperwork again, she saw, rather reminding her of her self in those days following their brief interlude. He did not look up when she entered, still poring over several contracts.

Tenderness tugged at her heart as she gazed at his handsome face, worn-out and tired.

_You need someone to take care of you…but Kaho is no longer here to keep you happy._

Then he looked up and saw her. That moment of vulnerability vanished as his features hardened upon seeing her.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, a mocking smile plastered on his face. "Want some action? Sorry, doll, but I am not in shape to give you what you want right now. Maybe some other time, we can fuck each other's brains out."

Her eyes widened at the coarseness of his language. Then she remembered that he had used a similar ploy before he left her several weeks ago. He meant to drive her away, to disgust her.

Well, she would put up with it. For now.

"What, did I shock you? As I recall…"

"You don't shock me anymore, Touya," she said softly. "And I did not come here to mince words with you."

"Then why are you here? I told you, I'm not in the mood…"

She reddened as his hot gaze swept over her. Then she saw that she had seen the baby bundled in her arms and his seductive smile vanished abruptly.

"Now, don't tell me that I got you pregnant and that kid is mine," he joked, but his eyes were intent on her.

"T-Touya, she's not mine, don't be silly."

"I know as much," he said blandly. "But what is that kid doing here in my office with you?"

"See…"_She can do this._ "I…I want you to meet your daughter, Touya."

"What? Quit joking and leave my office. I'm too busy, too old to play games with a brat like you."

_Always, I was the brat. Wasn't I, Touya? Now I'm just a plaything you used and discarded. And yet, I keep coming back for more…_

"Please listen, Touya. She…is your daughter. Yours…and Kaho's."

"What did you say?" He whispered, and before she knew it, he was standing in front of her and gripping her shoulders tightly. "Who…is this child?"

"She's your daughter. I…I'm sorry. I saw you, you see…the day she…she…" She cannot say the words. She can't bring them up again, not with the wounds so fresh. It would only bring him more pain.

"How dare you," he didn't storm out at her, but his eyes blazed with fury. "Who told you I wanted to…to…"

"You weren't thinking straight," she reasoned. "You'd never have let her go, Touya. She's Kaho's…"

"You don't know me, Li Meiling, so don't go telling me what I was feeling!" His shout disturbed the baby and she stepped away from him, trying to appease the child.

"Hush, baby…" She whispered, looking accusingly at him. "See what you did? You disturbed her. Now, don't be unreasonable, please. She needs you."

"As far as I'm concerned, that child is not mine, not anymore. I gave her away."

"You don't mean that…"

"Oh, I do. You don't know how I feel. You don't know how sometimes, I wished that child were dead instead of Kaho!"

"Touya!" She stared at him, horrified by his words.

"I see that I have shocked you now. But it's true…I would have done anything to save Kaho. Anything…I would have given up our baby…If Kaho lived, we could have had another one…"

"Touya, please…just, just look at her…it isn't her fault that Kaho…"

"Stop it. I don't want that child. Looking at her reminds me…of her. No. Take her back to her family. Take her back!" For a moment, Meiling was scared—he looked insane, mad. She realized she never knew him at all.

"I…I can't," she said, her voice small. "I took her because I thought…"

"Well, you thought wrong!"

"But she is yours!"

"I don't care, it doesn't matter…"

"Then I'll take her with me," she challenged.

"Do as you want. I don't care." Then he gazed at her. "You haven't changed a bit. Always, you were an arrogant, assuming brat. You think you can make people do what you expect them to, what you want them to. But this is one man who won't be manipulated—remember that."

"I…I don't think I ever knew you at all," she whispered. How can she tell him about the child now? If he could turn away the child of the woman he loved, what more of her, the girl whose attentions he had scorned from the start?

She couldn't believe he could be so heartless, so cruel…

To tell him about her pregnancy would be a terrible mistake, she realized. Perhaps later—it might even take years—but not now, not with the bitterness of his loss gnawing at his insides

For now, she'd raise their child alone, along with his daughter. No matter what, the children will want nothing. She'd love them both, just as she had loved their father…still do, despite the way he so callously treated her.

She gazed at him, suddenly realizing she never really knew the man…or maybe the man he had become after Kaho's death. It was too early, perhaps. The pain and the memories are still strong.

Without another word, Meiling turned and left the office, fighting the urge to run. It wouldn't be good for the baby.

_All I wanted was to make you happy. But it seems I have caused you pain again…_

At that moment, the child in her arms began to cry.

"Oh no, don't cry, sweetheart. Mama is here," she whispered. "If your papa won't have you…I guess I'll be your mama for a very long time, then. Perhaps even forever."

She'd give him time. But if things don't progress…

_It wasn't you talking, Touya. I know it wasn't._

She will just have to accept that he wasn't the man she thought he was.

Even if it killed her.

---

Syaoran stared at the results of the investigation with disbelieving eyes.

He had promised that he would not interfere, but it did not mean that he would sit around and do nothing. He had to find out who did it to Meiling.

And now, the answer was in front of him. The problem was that, there had to be some mistake.

It can't be his brother-in-law. He and Touya were never close—Touya never quite forgave him from what transpired between him and Sakura.

But he also knew that Touya loved his late wife to distraction. He couldn't have done it…not after just a few weeks after Kaho's death.

_Unless…_

He knew how Meiling used to find the man attractive. It had waned over the years, or so he had believed.

However, before he could contemplate the matter further, his wife entered the room.

"What are you doing?" She asked softly.

"Nothing," he said quickly—too quickly. Sakura's eyes narrowed.

"What is that?"

"Nothing…just an…"

She recognized the folder at once for what it was—an investigation result.

"You said you wouldn't interfere! You promised, Li Syaoran! Meiling-chan's affair is none of your…" She stopped ranting when he handed her the folder.

"No, I won't read it. I swore Meiling-chan…I promised…"

"It might interest you," he said grimly. "Read it, sweetheart, and tell me if I shouldn't have done what I did."

She slowly opened the folder and scanned the contents quickly, her eyes widening with each line.

Then, she did something totally unexpected. She swore.

"That bastard! How dare he do this to Meiling-chan? Bastard! I can't believe he is my brother!" Then she stalked off.

"Sakura, where are you going?"

"To my brother's office. He is so going to get it from me!"

"We promised not to interfere, remember?" He asked, although he was itching to have a go at Kinomoto Touya as well, pay him back for all the hardship he went through with Sakura.

But he knew this case was different.

"That was before I learned it was my stupid brother's doing! He'll see…" Sakura screeched, muttering to herself as she left.

Syaoran could only hope that all would go well in the end. Sakura could be most irrational when angry.

And as for Meiling…they deserve an explanation from her.

In the end, he'd make sure that Meiling would be taken care of.

Whether Touya Kinomoto is amenable to it or not.

TBC


	8. Chapter 6: Wed

**My Happy Ending**

**Witch-Mistress-Animaru**

A/N: Finally.

6: Wed

_**Once upon a time, there lived a queen whose cold demeanor was created by the emptiness around her. The reason behind this coldness is a king she loved, a king married to a beautiful, kind queen. She had resigned herself to remain an empty shell, until fate took things in its hands: The queen died, leaving the king all alone.**_

_**Does happiness have a chance for the lonely queen of ice?**_

_He's the reason for the teardrops in my guitar,_

_The only reason I keep wishing on a wishing star_

_The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart…_

The song played on like an annoying tape inside my head. I switched songs.

_So sick of love songs, so tired of tears_

_So done with wishing you were still here…_

That's it. I'm switching off my iPod.

Why do love songs keep playing just when you don't need to hear them anymore?

- Excerpt from Li Meiling's very secret diary

Touya was barely aware of his office door opening with a blast as he pored on official documents. He looked up to see his brother-in-law, the _gaki,_ striding purposefully towards him, his face grim.

"Oi, why —" he never got to finish his sentence as he stood up, because Syaoran's just landed a facer straight at his jaw.

"You'd pay for that, _gaki,_" he growled as he lunged at Syaoran.

"Consider that my payment for what you did to Meiling." Syaoran's voice was calm, but determined nevertheless, his face set.

"What…" It took a moment before the message sunk in, but when it did, Touya's face paled. "What do you mean?"

"I'm sure you know. He's pregnant, you bastard, and you know who the father is! At least before Sakura got pregnant we sure as hell were married."

Pregnant…that can't be.

But apparently, it was true, for he never saw the _gaki_ so grim and determined.

Memories of a dark day at the hospital flooded him, at once bitter and sweet.

_How he gave away his own child._

---

At that exact moment Meiling was driving a little below the speed limit on her way to Touya's office, with Sakura beside her.

"Please don't drive so quickly, Meiling-chan," Sakura said. "While I'm afraid of what'd happen to those two, please stay safe, Meiling-chan…"

"Don't worry, I can handle this speed. And don't worry about those two. They'd deserve whatever they get," she snapped, annoyed. She was mad at Syaoran for breaking his promise to never interfere, but at the same time she wanted to see Touya's face bloodied to some point.

She was working at the office earlier, trying to drown her problems, when Sakura came stumbling in, a folder in hand.

A folder which, she saw was carrying the investigation details of her life some weeks back.

"Oh, Meiling-chan, Syaoran only wanted to take care of you."

She didn't trust herself to answer. She hoped that both Touya and Syaoran are already indisposed.

Or else she'd murder them herself.

---

But the two did not even come close to coming to blows — Touya knew he could not fight Syaoran; he was not such a bastard.

"I cannot marry her for that," Touya said slowly, all the fight gone in him. "I can never be a good father. I'd always remember Kaho and that fateful day she left me. For her good, it's better if we never…have an association again."

"Do you understand now?" He continued, looking Syaoran in the eye.

"What I understand is you're a bloody coward." Syaoran spat out. "You can't even muster the courage to fight off the ghosts of your past, in order to look forward to the future."

"Kaho…it will always come back to Kaho. I'm sorry, but she will always be my number one."

"I didn't say you have any choice in the matter." Syaoran replied, his face grim.

"And I didn't say you have the right to interfere with my life, Xiao Lang," a shrill voice said from the doorway. They both looked up to see Meiling standing there, Sakura right behind her.

She moved forward, her eyes flashing. "How dare you. You are just my cousin, in case you are forgetting, Xiao Lang."

"You are like a sister to me, Meiling, and I can't let that pass so easily!"

"It's not for you to decide."

"Yes, it is! As the head of the Li family, it's my responsibility to ensure you are taken care of!"

"I'm removing that responsibility from your hands." She turned away, and looked at Touya — the man in her dreams, the cause of her perpetual heartache. She nearly got swept away just looking at him, but she steadied herself anyway.

"You don't need to worry, Kinomoto-san," she said softly, almost formally. "I am not holding you responsible for this."

"Meiling-chan, are you sure?" Sakura asked, eyeing her carefully.

"Yes. I would not want to expose my child to such a man for a father," her voice was at once mocking and challenging, but Touya refused to rise to the bait.

There was a beat of awkward silence.

"Well, I guess…if they're sure, it isn't really our business, anata," Sakura said softly, before turning her accusing eyes to her brother. "I've never been more ashamed of you, oniichan," she whispered, turning away.

The three of them turned to leave.

---

Touya knew he should feel relieved. But as his eyes met ruby ones, he felt nothing but shame inside him.

It wasn't manly of him. But he long lost faith in himself — Kaho's death robbed him of that.

And yet, as the three walked away, he found he couldn't let it end at that.

"Wait." His own voice surprised him, raspy as it sounded.

All but one turned to him.

"If I must…yes, I will marry her."

Sakura's eyes widened, while the _gaki _had the gall to smirk at him. He saw Meiling stiffen, before turning back at him, eyes flashing.

"Please don't feel obliged on my behalf. I assure you, it is most unwanted."

"But I do not feel obliged," he lied. "Maybe 'challenged' is the better word."

"You fancy that I challenged you to it? Well, I did not. I was merely stating a fact…that you refuse to be a father."

He let the jab pass. It was too close to home for comfort.

"Then let's say I'm the one challenging you, Li Meiling."

"Challenging me to what? You know what, let's stop this juvenile talk. We both know we don't want it, so why push it?"

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you not want to get married?" Lord, the words feel strange, coming from him.

"Of course I don't. Who would want to?"

"I remember a time when…"

"You know what? Just…just shut it." She said, clenching her fists. "I was not challenging you to offer marriage. Now can you stop playing games?"

"But I am not playing games. In fact, I'm the one challenging you to it." When she did not retort, he continued. "You say I'm not husband material, that I'd be the last man you'd expose _our_ child to. Well, are you up to the challenge of marrying me and changing all that, Li Meiling?"

"Is that a proposal or what?" Syaoran butted in, looking amused and annoyed at the same time.

"Stay out of this," Meiling snapped, not taking her eyes off Touya's. "Do you really think I'd take on such juvenile task?"

"If it's so juvenile then why even consider it?" He knew he should stop at that. The lady said no, and he'd be able to walk away with less guilt on his shoulders. But still…

"Alright, you win. But you confuse me, Touya. I thought you wanted out? I was giving you what you wanted. But put like that…you know I don't back down from challenges."

"Is that a yes?"

"Apparently so."

"That's settled then," Syaoran interfered loudly, before the two had the chance to kill each other off. "Well? So when will it be?"

"Now, if you wish."

"Now?"

"Yes, now."

---

By 3 pm that same day, they were married, with Sakura and Syaoran as their witnesses.

"Where do we go now?"

"We don't really need to go home together, do we? We both know it was formality's sake, to ensure that our child isn't named a bastard."

"We will live together, definitely. But I'd let you get used to that idea. But I'd take you home."

Meiling knew it was useless to argue.

So there they were, strangers as it were, driving towards Meiling's home.

Awkward silence fell over them until they reached the house.

"Pack your things tonight, I'd see you tomorrow," Touya said gruffly.

"You don't expect me to move in that dinghy place of yours?"

"You choose: you move in my place or I'd move in yours."

"I'd prefer to keep this setup — you stay in your place, and I'd stay in mine, thank you very much."

"No, we need to ensure you don't overwork yourself. You're pregnant, remember?"

"As if I'd forget."

"Well, it's settled. I'd move in with you tomorrow."

Meiling felt tired, too tired to argue with him, so she just nodded.

She alighted from the car, not letting him assist her.

She stared as the car drove off. She still couldn't believe it; it was all too fast for her. Several weeks ago their parting had been bitter, angry. And suddenly they were married? Something didn't feel right…she didn't dare hope it will all go well.

…For hoping was for fools, and she stopped being a fool years ago.

Before she was able to enter the building of her enterprise, an old lady walked out with a child.

The old woman waved at her, with the bawling child in her arms.

"Thank goodness, you're here. She won't stop wailing. Seems she wants her mama. Here you go, dear, take her, please. You said she'd be a dear, but my ears hurt badly from all her cries."

She took the child, bewildered. Then she remembered what was wrong.

Earlier today, she'd left Touya's daughter in the care of that old woman, her neighbor.

The baby stopped crying immediately when she held it at her arms, but she was too shocked to notice.

For that baby stood as the reminder of everything between her and the man who was now her husband.

_Kaho._

_What have I done?_

TBC


End file.
